Killer snails at large!

So last week I’m prancing down the street in the rain, when suddenly I slip on something, and slide along the sidewalk.

I look back, and literally ten feet of sidewalk is smeared with remnants of something slimey. I look under my boot, and what do I find? A fucking snail! And I like snails, I think they’re cute. But I don’t like snails who lurk in bushes and zoom out in front of me in vain attempt to become very small skate as I walk by.

On the upside though, it was a Spanish slug, which in Denmark are called killer snails (way cooler name, right?), so I didn’t feel too bad about it (also killer snail trying to trip me? totally living up to his name or at least trying to). There’s nothing worse than stepping on something, and hear tell tale crushing noise of snails previous home now reduced to debris, and sad homeless snail weeping on the sidewalk (might be getting carried away a bit now).

Another upside? I didn’t fall and decapitate myself , which maybe means, I’m becoming more graceful or lucky. I’m crossing my fingers for lucky.